8am: bathroom. Suse in the shower, Son #1 cleaning his teeth.
Suse: [leaning out of the shower and shouting slightly hysterically because she doesn’t have her glasses on] Oh god, if Mrs Weasley dies I’m going to be sending hate mail to J K Rowling. Does Mrs Weasley die? DOES SHE?!
Son #1: [enthusiastically, but muffled, due to toothbrush] D’you want me to tell you?!
Suse: No! NO! Don’t say a word!
Evening: in front of the fire, Soup Family all present and reading.
Suse: [looking up in dawning horror] Oh god, I bet the whole of Hogwarts is a Horcrux, isn’t it?!
Son #1: [excitedly] D’you want me to tell you?!
Suse: No! Shut UP! Don’t say a word!
Ten minutes later.
Suse: Oh god, I just know that Snape is going to turn out to be a good guy. And THAT means Dumbledore is really a BAD guy, isn’t he? Oh god oh god oh god I can’t bear it!
Son #1: [desperately] D’you want me to tell you?! Please, can I tell you?!
Suse: No! Be quiet! Don’t say a WORD!
Next morning, 8am: kitchen.
Suse: Oh god, Lupin is gonna die!!!!! I’m sure!
Son #1: [spilling his porridge in his haste to answer] D’you want me to tell you?!
Suse: Shut uuuup!
Son #1: [flapping hysterically] Will you hurry up and FINISH?! I NEED TO DISCUSS IT!!!! Oh god I can't BEAR it!!!!!!
Tonight. 10pm: Son #1’s bedroom.
Suse: [hissing and wailing at the same time] Wake up! I finished! I need to talk to you!! Oh god, wake UUUUUUUUUPP!!!!!